Do you believe that English is easy…? I don’t thinks so.

The following text is discussing the difficulties in English.  May be they are a bit funny but it could be one of your mistakes in English.

• There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.

• Doesn’t it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend?

When the stars are out, they are visible,

When the lights are out, they are invisible.

• If teachers taught, why didn’t preachers praught?

• If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

• C’mon, let’s polish the Polish furniture.

• The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
• Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
• How can ‘A Slim Chance’ and ‘A Fat Chance’ be the same?
• How can ‘You’re so cool’ and ‘You’re not so hot’ be different?
• Why are ‘A Wise man’ and ‘A Wise guy’ opposites?

• A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line. !!!
  
• The bandage was wound around the wound.
• I did not object to the object.
• The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
• Boxing rings are square.
• A guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
• The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.

Now try some more confusing…!

• There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
• Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat.
• The farm was used to produce produce.
• English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France.

And now, Some questions which have remained unanswered …!

• If brother becomes Brethren, why doesn’t mother become Methren?
• If tooth becomes teeth, why doesn’t booth become beeth?
• If one goose becomes two geese, why doesn’t one moose become two meese?
• If I speak of a foot and you show me your feet,
  And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
• How come Writers write but Fingers don’t fing?
  And Grocers don’t groce and Hammers don’t ham?

A hat in the plural doesn’t become hose .
And a cat in the plural doesn’t become cose.??????

• A box in the plural becomes is boxes.
  But an Ox in the plural never becomes oxes. (It becomes Oxen).
• A lone mouse can transform into a whole set of mice,
  But it’s impossible for a single house to become a whole block of hice. (It becomes houses).
• Although the masculine pronouns are he, his and him, we must be grateful for small mercies of the language that the feminine pronouns after ‘She’ don’t become ‘Shis’ and ‘Shim’.
• If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
• A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
• How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
• He could lead if he could only get the lead out.
• They were too close to the door to close it.
• I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
• When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
• You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language
  in which your house can burn up as it burns down,
  in which you fill in a form by filling it out
  and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
• It is only in the English language that people recite at a play and play at a recital.
• No sooner had my eye fallen upon the tear in the painting, then this eye of mine began to shed many a tear.
• I was given a number of injections to make the pain number.
• It’s not ridiculous, but entirely sensible to ship by truck and send cargo by ship.
• We are a strange lot to have noses that run and feet that smell.
• The buck does funny things when the does are present.
• I was proven right that I had the right of way.
• How come you never hear of a combobulated, gruntled, ruly, or peccable person?
• Why is it that whether you sit down or sit up, the results are the same?
• Shouldn’t there be a shorter word for “monosyllable”?
• If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
• If people from Poland are called “Poles,” why aren’t people from Holland called “Holes?
• If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn’t it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
• The human race has been running for a great many centuries now – but we’re not tired yet.
• “I am” is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that “I do” is the longest sentence?
• The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.

Now, Do you still thing that English is easy…?!

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